


Five times Ray and Sam agreed on something (Even if they didn't want to)

by millygal



Series: Five Things - LoM [3]
Category: Life on Mars (UK)
Genre: 5 Things, 5 Times, Gen, M/M, five things trope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 13:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10697850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millygal/pseuds/millygal
Summary: The world's gonna end, Ray and Sam actually agree on something...





	Five times Ray and Sam agreed on something (Even if they didn't want to)

I.

"t'isn't"

"Is"

"t'isn't"

"Bloody well is"

"Ow, now who's gettin' their knickers in a twist?"

"I'm not getting my 'knickers' in a twist. I just know I'm right"

"No, you ain't"

"Yes, I am"

"No, you ain't"

"Yes, I am"

"No Gladys, you ain't right, you're so far off right that you're singin' Disney songs, makin' fairy cakes an' prancin' round in pink wellie boots"

"Uh, Guv?"

"What!"

"Hate to point this out but, he's right"

"Wha...."

"Rock Hudson is as bent as a nine bob note"

"He's...no he's..."

"'fraid so"

"See"

"Smart arse"

"You'd know"

"What?"

"Nothing Ray"

II.

Sam's sat, gripping onto his arm rest, refusing to look out the windscreen because the scenery's rushing by so fast he feels like he's gonna throw up.

Chris and Ray are being hurled round the back seat, bumping into each other and swearing. Sam's sure he's heard Chris yelp at least twice and Ray's had his face plastered to the back of the Guv's headrest so many times, his nose's started to go flat.

They take yet another corner at break neck speed and Sam finds himself yelling before he's had chance to think the action through, "Slow the fuck down!"

Gene turns, sneers at him and pushes down harder on the pedal, causing the car to lurch sideways.

Sam rolls his eyes, realises that's a mistake when his chip bap from lunch threatens a return journey and buries his head in the crook of his arm.

He hears Chris curse behind him, feels something thump into the back of his seat and what sounds scarily like the Lords prayer being recited in broken Mancunian English.

He's about to open his mouth and beg Gene to go easy when Ray beats him to it, "Seriously Guv, fuckin' slow down!"

III.

He's got long jet black hair, beautiful sea green eyes and an arse that won't quit and both Ray and Sam can't seem to take their eyes off him as he walks past.

They're stood outside the 'Arms, waiting for Gene and Chris to come back with the car.

They've got no idea who he is but they're not willing to look away until he's disappeared round the corner.

Not even the sound of Gene throwing the Cortina into the space next to them is enough to break their concentration. However, Gene and Chris both hollering at them from the front seat, is.

"Oi, Gladys, mind puttin' ya eyes back in!"

"Raymond, get ya backside in this car, now!"

Sam and Ray both jump, bow their heads, take one last lingering look at Mr Tight-Jeans before clambering into the back of the car, smirking.

IV.

Gene storms through CID's double doors, foul mood in full swing and pushes past Ray and Sam who are stood at the tea trolly, grabbing themselves a brew.

Sam finds himself drawn to the extremely tight pair of trousers the Guv's wearing and ends up burning himself on the tea urn because he's so preoccupied with checking out his superior's arse.

He yelps, shoves his thumb in his mouth and checks to see if Ray's noticed his little slip.

The expression on Ray's face tells Sam that he knows exactly what he was just doing. The blush tells him that he was doing the same thing.

V.

"It's not mine"

"S'bloody well not mine"

"I jus' bought one"

"That leaves..."

"Div 'ead"

"For fuck sake..."

"Pardon?"

"Nothin' boss"

"No, I'm pretty sure ya jus' said..."

"Don't you friggin' start"

Fin


End file.
